It's the Lebanese' turn to have the piss taken outta them!!!
Why did the leb die?
Coz he was fully sick mate!!!!!
Why do leb's wear thick gold chains?
So they know where to stop shaving
What do you call a leb in the ocean drowning, screaming for help?
Fukim
What do you call a leb on a bike?
Ali Davidson
What do you call a leb on the moon?
Naser
What do you call a hot chick in Lebanon??
A tourist
Who won the Lebanese beauty contest?
No-one
What do you call three leb's in a sauna?
Gorillas in the mist
Why don't leb's wear underwear?
Coz Nike don't make them
What do you call a leb who has had an abortion?
Crime Stopper
What do you call a leb between two buildings?
Ali
What do you call a drunk leb?
Hamed
What do you call a really drunk leb?
Mohamed
What do you call a really drunk leb in between two buildings?
Mohamed Ali
Why did the leb cross the road?
To smash the chicken...
Why did fifty leb's cross the road??
Coz the chicken was winning
Why didn't the lebanese olympic boxing team compete in Sydney 2000?
They found out you had to fight one on one
What do you call a good looking leb?
Asif
What to call a leb hairdresser?
Ali Barber
What do you call a baby leb?
Kebab
How do you make a baby leb shut up?
Shush Kebab
Regards Bill
Busa's Rule On The Rest
Simmo you dopey bastard, the very first joke in this topic is exactly what you reprinted here. I dont know, bloody copper silver rider, see what riding on a bike that has the colour scheme of a 3 day old turd does to ya
Now for a real joke.....
Theres a woman on all fours in the lounge room with cum dripping out of her arse and out of her mouth, what does that tell you....
Floors Level.
Regards
Graham
1hotBUSA
Strike a blow for freedom...Smash a speed camera!!!
What are you talking about
you got way to much time on your hands if you keep reading every joke
Cheers Robert
".... Just when I was getting used to yesterday, "along comes today!!...."Edited by: simmo at: 23/8/05 5:09 pm
Not if it is on page 1 I havent, at the very top, when you open the thread for the very first time......is the point sinking in.
Regards
Graham
1hotBUSA
Strike a blow for freedom...Smash a speed camera!!!
WORLD WAR III IS COMING
President Bush and Rumsfeld are sitting in a bar.
A guy walks in and asks the barman, "Isn't that Bush and Rumsfeld sitting over there?"
The bartender says, "Yep, that's them."
So the guy walks over and says, "Wow, this is a real honour! . What are you guys doing in here?"
Bush says, "We're planning WW III."
And the guy says, "Really? What's going to happen?"
Bush says, "Well, we're going to kill 140 million Muslims and one blonde with big tits."
The guy exclaimed, "A blonde with big tits? Why kill a blonde with big tits?"
Bush turns to Rumsfeld and says, "See, I told you no one CARES about the 140 million Muslims".
Postman Pat
It was Postman Pat's last day on the job after 40 years of carrying the Mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighbourhood. When he arrived At the first house on his route, he was greeted by the whole family there Who all hugged and congratulated him and sent him on his way with a gift cheque for $500.
At the second house they presented him fine Cuban cigars in an 18-carat gold box.
The folks at the third house handed him a case of 30-year old Scotch whisky.
At the fourth house a blonde in her lingerie met him at the door. She Took him by the arm and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced.
When he had had enough they went downstairs, where the blonde fixed him A giant breakfast: eggs, tomatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and freshly Squeezed orange juice. When he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of
Steaming coffee.
As she was pouring, he noticed a $5 note sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge. "All this was just too wonderful for words," he said, "but what's the five dollars for?"
"Well," said the dumb blonde, "last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day, and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you".
He said; "F**k him! Give him five bucks."
She smiled shyly and said, "The breakfast was my idea."
To My Dear Wife,
You will surely understand that I have certain needs
that you with your 54 years can no longer supply. I am very happy with you and I value you as a good wife. Therefore after reading this fax, I hope that you will not wrongly interpret the fact that I will be spending the evening with my 18 year old secretary at the Comfort
Inn Hotel. Please don't be perturbed I shall be back home before midnight.
When the man came home, he found the following letter on the dining room table that contained the following:
My Dear Husband,
I received your fax and thank you for your honesty.
I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that you are also 54 years old. At the same time I would like to inform you that while you read this, I will be at the Hotel Fiesta, with Michael, my tennis coach who like your secretary , is also 18 years old. As a successful
businessman and with your excellent knowledge of Math, you will understand that we are in the same situation, although with one small difference.
18 goes into 54 a lot more times than 54 goes into 18. Therefore I will not be back before lunchtime tomorrow.
Mr Davidson vs God
The inventor of the Harley-Davidson motorcycle,
Arthur Davidson, died and went to heaven. At
the gates, St. Peter told Arthur. "Since you've
been such a good man and your motorcycles have
changed the world, your reward is, you can hang
out with anyone you want to in heaven."
Arthur thought about it for a minute and then
said, "I want to hang out with God."
St. Peter took Arthur to the Throne Room, and
introduced him to God.
God recognized Arthur and commented, "Okay, so
you were the one who invented the
Harley-Davidson motorcycle?"
Arthur said, "Yeah, that's me...."
God commented: "Well, what's the big deal in
inventing something that's pretty unstable,
makes noise and pollution and can't run without
a road?"
Arthur was apparently embarrassed, but finally
spoke, "Excuse me, but aren't you the inventor
of woman?"
God said, " Ah, yes."
"Well ," said Arthur, "professional to
professional, you have some major design flaws
in your invention:
1. There's too much inconsistency in the
front-end protrusion
2. It chatters constantly at high speeds
3. Most rear ends are too soft and wobble too
much
4. The intake is placed way too close to the
exhaust
5. The maintenance costs are outrageous!!!!
"Hmmmmm, you may have some good points there,"
replied God, "hold on."
God went to his Celestial supercomputer, typed
in a few words and waited for the results. The
computer printed out a slip of paper and God
read it. "Well, it may be true that my invention is
flawed," God said to Arthur, "but according to
these numbers, more men are riding my invention
than yours.................
Good one GDY.
More Women riding them as well.
Rgds BUSGO
Lesbonics.......
1. What do you call a cupboard full of lesbians?
....A licker cabinet.
2. What do you call an Eskimo lesbian?
.... A Klondyke.
3. What do you call 100 lesbians with guns?
...Militia Etheridge.
4. Why can't lesbians diet and wear make-up at the same time?
....Because they can't eat Jenny Craig with Mary Kay on their face.
5. What do you call two lesbians in a canoe?
...Fur Traders.
6. What is a lesbian dinosaur called?
....A Lickalotapuss.
7. What do you call a lesbian with long fingers?
....Well Hung.
8. Did you hear that Ellen DeGeneres drowned?
...She was found face down in Ricki Lake.
9. How can you tell a tough lesbian bar?
.....Even the pool table doesn't have balls.
10. What do you call lesbian twins?
....Lick-a-likes.
11. What's the definition of confusion?
...Twenty blind lesbians in a fish market.
12. What's the difference between a Ritz cracker and a lesbian?
....One's a snack cracker, the other's a crack snacker Quote:If only she could wash and cook
...Diablo
When I got home from work last night, my wife demanded that I take her out to some place expensive...................
So I took her to a petrol station!!!!!!!
Cheers,
Pete
Mobile Dj, Web Design, Photography, Bullshit Artist?
Z Web World
"I don't want a pickle,
I just wanna ride my motorsickle."
Arlo Guthrie 1969
THE DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT
There's nothing worse than a doctor's receptionist who insists you tell
her what is wrong in a room full of other patients.
I know most of us have experienced this, and I love the way this senior*
* citizen handled it.
An 86 year old man walked into a crowded doctor's office. As he
approached the desk, the receptionist said, "Yes sir, what are you seeing
the doctor for today?"
"There's something wrong with my dick," he replied.
The receptionist became irritated and said, "You shouldn't come into a
crowded office and say things like that."
"Why not? You asked me what was wrong and I told you," he said.
The receptionist replied, "You've obviously caused some embarrassment
in this roomful of people. You should have said there is something wrong
with your ear or something and then discussed the problem further with
the doctor in private."
The man replied, "You shouldn't ask people things in a room full of
others, if the answer could embarrass anyone." The man walked out, waited
several minutes and then reentered.
The receptionist smiled smugly and asked, "Yes?"
"There's something wrong with my ear," he stated.
The receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken
her advice. "And what is wrong with your ear, sir?"
"I can't piss out of it," the man replied.
The doctor's office erupted in laughter.*
Phuck its the phantom!
Good one Rocket, I nearly fell off my chair
Rocket,
These are supposed to be jokes, not real life experiences.
Rgds BUSGO
The 7 degrees of Blonds
FIRST DEGREE
A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning.
The wife (undoubtedly blonde), picked up the phone, listened a moment and
said "How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!" and hung up.
The husband said, "Who was that?" The wife said, "I don't know, some woman
wanting to know if the coast is clear."
SECOND DEGREE
Two blondes are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the
sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror and
says, "Hmm, this person looks familiar." The second blonde says, "Here, let
me see!" So the first blonde hands her the compact. The second one looks in
the mirror and says, "You dummy, it's me!"
THIRD DEGREE
A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and buys
a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door
she finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really angry.
She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she is overcome
with grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her head.
The boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don't do it!!!" The blonde replies, "Shut
up, you're next!"
FOURTH DEGREE
A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals.
She proudly says, "Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them." A friend says,
"OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin?" The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy:
W."
FIFTH DEGREE
What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?
"Is it mine?"
SIXTH DEGREE
Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA freshman, sat in her US
government class. The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade
was about. Bambi pondered the question then finally said, "That was the
decision George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware"
SEVENTH DEGREE
Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her
house ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and
reported the crime.
The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit,
patrolling nearby was the first to respond. As the K-9 officer approached
the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch,
shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps.
Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, "I come home to find all my
possessions stolen. I call the police for help, and what do they do? They
send me a BLIND policeman."
Max
Madmax - GSX1300R Black and Blue Buses Rule
Good Bike, Good Woman, Good Road, Good Weather, Good God - Good Bye!
Smith and Wesson - The original point and click interface.
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