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Ooops
#1
Christmas day was spent with my family at Portarlington.

Nice and easy all the way home (in car with in-laws in back), knowing boys in blue will be about in force. Just before westgate bridge, their is a family stuck in the third lane out. Blown tyre, and the tread is all chewed up in the guard. They cannot move the car, and don't know what to do. I stop in the emergency stopping lane, run out to them, and they're in a sticky situation. They find out at this point in time they have no handle for their jack, so I grab ours, and we start changing the tyre, with another car blocking the lane we were working in. Get the car up, undo the wheel nuts, and the boys in blue appear. They yell at us, tell us to retighten the nuts (although we are almost through) lower the car, and drive it off the highway. They would not believe it wouldn't drive. It did in the end cause I hacked the tread off with the crow bar.

Anyway, there are now one unmarked car and one candy car here, and they are just making themselves important by being dramatic and asking questions, when one uniform runs up to another. "We gotta go - there's a runner". They go to their car, wait a minute and pull out when an R1 (I think) goes past, trying hard to blend in with the traffic. Two or three minutes later another candy car with lights and sirens who was THAT far behind his chase goes past. They had the poor sod pulled over on the bridge, and the airwing were just pulling away towards the city. I think he may have got away if we hadn't had the two cars occupied where we did.
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#2
Heard a joke many years ago ,cant remember it all but the crunch was,
A little girl said to her mummy,
Mummy do prostitutes have babies?
To which mummy replied. Of course they do ,where do you think all the policemen come from.
SO thats why there are so many of these egotistical parasites in Victoria.
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#3
I suppose Richard that's what happens when you ride a grand piano.

Would be interesting to know if he was just a speeder or if there was more to the story (like a stolen bike or something). Seems a bit heavy handed to call in the airwing just for somebody that was speeding.
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#4
Do you guys do know what the difference is between a traffic cop and a vagina? On one of them you can see the C*#@ behind the bush!
Anon.
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#5
Saw this in a UK MCN...
A guy flying down the road (10 mph over limit)
Cop pulls him over walked up to the bike with a patroning
smirk asked; ''whats your hurry?'' to which the biker replied
l'm late for work Oh yeah said the cop "what do you do?''
I'm a Rectum Stretcher! and what does a Rectum Stretcher
do?"
Well, l start by inserting one finger, then two then three then
four, then with my whole hand in, work side to side until
I can get both hands in, and then slowly but surely stretch,
until its six foot wide".
"And just what do you do with a six foot arsehole?"he said.
To which the biker politely replied,
You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge...
FINE 60pound 3points.. But the look on the cops face priceless.
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